Seniors are increasingly becoming victims of domestic violence

Seniors are increasingly becoming victims of domestic violence. But only a fraction of them ask for help

press release ~ Elpida

Every day, at least one senior woman or man who is a victim of domestic violence calls the Senior Citizen Line. In the first six months of this year alone, 207 people have contacted the staff of the helpline, which is run by the pro-senior organisation Elpida. This is only a few fewer cases than in the whole of the previous year. The fact that this is an increasing trend is proven by the figures of the Police of the Czech Republic.

Seniors are ideal victims of domestic violence
Victims of domestic violence share many characteristics. And seniors, unfortunately, meet virtually all of them, making them literally ideal victims. They are in poorer health, less independent (even completely dependent on the care of others) and live to some extentin social isolation - either because they are physically unwell or because they naturally lose contact as they get older. Socio-economic factors also play an important role - for example, people who are financially dependent on another person or in a difficult housing situation are more at risk of domestic violence.

Help only when life is at risk
Determining the exact moment when to ask for help is very difficult for the abused person, but extremely important. "A large group of victims simply suffer and hope that the abuser will stop. But domestic violence does not stop on its own, on the contrary, it tends to escalate," Klára Gramppová from the Senior Citizens' Line shares her experience and adds: "It sometimes takes our senior clients several years before they dare to ask for help. The aforementioned shame stands in their way, as well as the fear that the violence will worsen if they report the situation to the police."

Domestic violence is not just about extreme cases of brutal beatings. "The essence of domestic violence is captured by the term "abuse", which makes cohabitation unbearable," reads the definition of the Police of the Czech Republic: "Domestic violence takes place without witnesses between people who are close to each other. It starts very subtly, and the first signs are often not even noticed by the victim. However, if domestic violence is not stopped at the outset, it becomes repetitive and the physical assaults become increasingly brutal."

The number of calls from abused persons is increasing
In 2016, 292 seniors contacted the Senior Citizens Helpline in connection with domestic violence, in278 in 2017, and this year, the helpline staff have recorded 207 calls so far in the first six months alone. However, the number of seniors who contact the Hotline is only the imaginary tip of the iceberg. In particular, lack of information, prejudice and a strong sense of shame prevent most seniors from reporting domestic violence.

According to research by the Institute of Criminology, the vast majority of victims do not know where to turn for help. They do not know of organizations that would help and support them to take this step. They only get in touch with them when the domestic violence is so serious that it is life-threatening. Crisis helplines can offer very accessible help to clients.

Who to contact?
Persons at risk of domestic violence can contact the Police of the Czech Republic, the Intervention Centre, the Counselling Centre for Victims at the Probation and Mediation Service. However, it is sometimes not possible for a senior citizen to seek such a service, especially at the beginning of a situation. Help through an anonymous helpline, such as the Senior Citizens' Helpline, is easily accessible for most seniors. Early help is very important, and in the case of seniors it has its own specificities. "In general, the older a person gets, the harder it is to adapt to radical changes. Seniors therefore need more time and space to share before they decide to change their situation at all. The directive approach that is sometimes used when working with victims of domestic violence is not suitable for them. It may be that they prefer to break off cooperation. Seniors also experience a specific feeling of shame if the aggressor is their child. In addition to the shame from which all victims of domestic violence suffer, there is the additional feeling of shameand self-blame like 'It's my fault because I raised him/her this way, he/she is my child andI will always stand behind him/her...' This problem needs to be addressed and given sufficient space to process Klára Gramppová from the Senior Citizens' Line says .

The Senior Citizens' Line 800 200 007 is a free anonymous crisis line and helpline for seniors caring for the elderly and people in crisis. Operating hours are from 8 am to 8 pm every day, including weekends and holidays. Seniors can find the phone number, for example, on all O2 SIM cards and payphones. "It is these crisis situations that continue to show us how important the support of anonymous helplines is. We are therefore very happy to have been supporting the Senior Citizens' Helpline for ten years," adds Anna Kačabová, Director of the O2 Foundation. The Senior Citizens' Helpline is a registered social service and has been accredited by the Czech Association of Helplines since 2007. Its operator is Elpida.

How to act in case of domestic violence, advises the Police of the Czech Republic

Two stories of domestic violence*

Ms Alena, a caller to the Senior Citizens' Helpline, shares her challenging life situation: "I am a senior citizen and have been living with my partner for several years. But he does not treat me well. He always scolds me, wants me to clean and cook, even when I am not well. He does nothing at home. He has knocked me to the floor in anger several times, I have bruises everywhere, even on my face and bruised ribs. But I have to get through it. I'm paying off a debt I stupidly incurred, and I'm left with less than six thousand crowns from my pension. Where would I go? I'm a prisoner here..."

Mrs. Zdena turns to the Senior Citizens' Line about her father: "My father is almost ninety years old. He is not in good health. He lives with my brother, his son, and I used to go there on weekends to help with everything. My brother is unemployed, but you know, some of those things he just doesn't do. He's changed a lot lately. He won't let me see my dad. When I ring the bell, he won't answer and Daddy won't come to the door. The last time I got there, when my brother wasn't there, Daddy looked terrible. The apartment smelled bad, Daddy was thin and had bruises on his arm. I haven't seen him since, and when my brother's home, he won't let me in. I'm so worried about him..."

*callers' stories are recorded to preserve their full anonymity

Why is domestic violence dangerous?

Domestic violence takes place behind closed doors with no other witnesses. The victim usually blames or excuses the violence on the assailant, thus completely submitting to the violent person. Any behaviour by the attacker that diminishes our dignity and sets boundaries for us reinforces hisand allows him to escalate his attacks from verbal insults to physical attacks.

Even according to the experience of the Police of the Czech Republic, victims of domestic violence do not admit for a long time that the behaviour of the abuser is wrong. The moment they confront the abuser, an attack to intimidate the victim follows. Or the victim is ashamed of the attacker's behaviour. In either case, it is very difficult for her to deal with the situation. The longer the victim and the abuser stay together, the greater the consequences that the victim carries throughout his or her life. And it may not only be physical, but also psychological and economic. The police can evict a violent person from a shared home for up to 10 days and then the eviction can be extended for up to six months in civil proceedings. One must always think of his/her health, dignity and courage and deal with the situation NOW. By confiding in someone I trust, or a doctor, or calling a helpline and asking for advice, or reporting everything to the Police.

The most difficult thing to do is to be left alone, which is why the Police recommend confiding in a person the victim trusts, contacting intervention centres, family counselling centres, marriage counselling centres and interpersonal relations, civil counselling centres, crisis centres or helplines that have experience in dealing with domestic violence situations.

More information can be found on the police website, in the information for victims of crime section.

Read how the Senior Citizens Helpline helped at Christmas

Senior Citizens' Helpline in numbers
- Since its inception 15 years ago, it has helped more than 310,000 callers from all over the country.
- In 2017 alone, its staff recorded 35,000 calls.
- One call most often takes 8-20 minutes, sometimes even an hour.

The most frequent topics of calls in 2017 were
- Loneliness (3,657), family relationships (2,294) and personal problems (4,332).
- For 172 callers, LS staff tried to dispel thoughts of suicide or feelings of a complete loss of meaning in life.
- In 262 cases, the Line helped seniors to solve the problem of domestic violence.
Behind each of these numbers, however, is a person and his or her unique story.